On the Friday before Mother’s Day, our nation celebrates military family appreciation day. How appropriate since in the grand narrative of service to our nation, military spouses are the quiet heroes, weaving strength, love, and stability into the fabric of military life. Their sacrifices are profound, their courage unending, and their contributions immeasurable. As we pause to honor them, let us commit to a deeper understanding of their journey and a more enduring appreciation of the essential role they play.
I’ll never forget when my brother, a Marine and I were both deployed at the same time to the Middle East during Desert Storm. While we were ready to fight for our freedoms, the look on my mother’s face when she realized two of her children, only 19 and 23 respectively, will always haunt me. The shiny eyes, the trembling smile as she hugged us goodbye made me pause and reflect on the sacrifice she was making. How her entire life was now losing sleep and saying prayers and sending care packages and how she still had to work, and be a wife and a mother to our sister. Her grief and fear did not stop her from honoring us, and in fact, she is still our number one supporter. All the more amazing when you consider she had already gone through this. My dad was shipped to Viet Nam when she was still pregnant with me and again when she was pregnant with my sister. Her quiet strength, resilience, and sacrifices was and always has been exemplary. Though she may not wear a uniform, my mom has served our nation in countless ways that often goes unseen but is deeply felt.
And it’s not just Moms, but Dads too now that women make up 17% of our military (USO.com) and regardless, a military spouse’s journey is unlike any other. They build and rebuild their lives every few years, packing up homes, friendships, and memories into boxes as they head to the next duty station. They are the ones who kiss their partners goodbye at deployments, unsure if their spouse will return and yet continue to care for their families, maintain careers, build their communities, and keep life moving forward. They are the steady heartbeat at home, creating a foundation of love and support that allows service members to fulfill their demanding duties.
Many military spouses put their own career aspirations on hold, face employment challenges due to frequent relocations, and navigate the complexities of new schools, churches and Dentists. Others pursue education in non-traditional ways, balancing coursework with single parenting or uncertain schedules. All the while being a brave face to parents and children in a world that often celebrates veteran achievements but tends to ignore the quiet perseverance and adaptability of military spouses. Beyond their own families, military spouses serve as pillars within the broader military community. They create networks of support for each other, mentor newer spouses, volunteer their time, and foster a sense of belonging wherever they are stationed. They organize meal trains, babysitting, care package drives, and countless other acts of kindness that strengthen the bonds between families who often feel isolated or overwhelmed. In many ways, they are the glue that holds the community together.
Appreciating military spouses means more than offering a simple “thank you” once a year. It means acknowledging their daily realities and celebrating the strength and determination with which they meet them. It means their communities offering meaningful support—whether through flexible employment opportunities, better resources, improved childcare services, or community-building initiatives that help lessen the isolation that can accompany military life. And as we honor military spouses, it’s important to listen to their stories. Every spouse has a journey marked by unique challenges and triumphs: the first deployment they endured, the birth of a child their service member missed, the bittersweet farewell to a home they loved, the joy of a homecoming hug after months apart. Their stories are powerful, shaped by love, sacrifice, resilience, and an unwavering commitment to their families and their country.
Today, and every day, we can show appreciation by amplifying their voices, advocating for their needs, and recognizing their contributions not just as “support” but as vital and valued members of the military community. We can celebrate their achievements, however large or small, and offer real, tangible gratitude through action as well as words. Happy Military Spouse Appreciation Day! Your service, your heart, and your strength do not go unnoticed. Today, we celebrate you — and every day, we are grateful for you. Especially you Mom!
